I have lived a thousand lifetimes in one. There are moments in my past that are so achingly gorgeous that I still believe in fairy tales. And there are periods of darkness so intense that I still believe in villains.
Right now I am living in a gray area, surrounded by just enough love to help me breathe. But I am also surrounded by enemies, injustice, lies, and and a bone-deep sense of loneliness. And it totally sucks.
There have been moments when all I wanted was for someone to watch a film, read a book, or listen to a song...just so they could understand me a little better. I thought I would grow out of it, but I have not.
And today I realized that I wanted to hear about you. I want to know what song talks about what you're going through, what film yanks at your heart, what character is so much like you that you don't understand how the world can't see it.
You can post anonymously, you can message me privately, you can put your name in all caps and scream it at me...you can even write it in a journal and never show a soul. But get it out there. I will pay attention.
If anyone picks "Friday" by Rebecca Black, I'll happily come hang out with you...because clearly your problems are few.
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| Marianne from Strange Magic - Me Part 1 |
Moana - Me part 2
My Song
What I Want
Also What I Want
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Lars and the Real Girl, the movie that pulls at my heart
The song that speaks to me right now is "fear is a liar" by zach williams Because I never feel like I'm good enough.
ReplyDeleteThe film that forever yanks at my heart is steel magnolias. There is just something about southern living im fascinated with.
And I don't believe that there is any character out there that is like me. I believe I am too boring and lame for that.
Rachel, I am with you there about wanting that 1 of a kind special love that is just for you. I hope and pray one day love will come across my path. But I also fear that it will never happen for me. Cause im not worthy.
I know I only met you that 1 Time but you are truly an amazing person and am lucky to have met you.
Fear Is A Liar is an incredible song. Just remember that the idea that you're not worthwhile is a flat-out lie as well. And you definitely are not boring! I have never met anyone who didn't have a fire all their own...it's just that sometimes life beats it into hiding.
DeleteAnd hey, if you and I both end up old and alone with our children gone into the world, it'll be an excuse to go adventuring. We shall flirt with foreign men all across the globe. ;)
I like the sound of that! I need to find mt fire cause i sure cant feel it right now
ReplyDeleteOh jeez. I’m not very good at this, but I’m sure gonna try haha!
ReplyDeleteI guess, if I had to describe myself, it would be as a hurricane. I feel like a cacophony of meaningless noise and destruction, constantly tearing my way through life. Some days I drown in the pressured winds and dark waters, and sometimes I feel like I am strong, destroying everything that could even dare oppose me. I constantly feel that the screaming opinions of others tear my own voice out, leaving me small and shrunken and horribly alone. In comparison to everyone else though, my problems are few, so I’m almost glad for the shouting to drown out my own voice. I am almost glad that it feels I don’t have anyone anymore. It makes things easier, in some ways.
If I keep ahold of my own selfish dreams, what I want to do, what I want to accomplish, without focusing on my relationships with anyone, I feel that I have balanced on that slippery edge I walk. I’m on my own two feet again.
I’m not sure if there is a specific character I relate to? But here are a few songs that I feel describe me haha!
Waves - Dean Lewis
Empty - Olivia O’ Brien
Barbies - Pink
Eulogy -Charlie Allen
I Spend Too Much Time In My Room -The Band CAMINO
The Smallest Light -Ingrid Michaelson
Vienna -Billy Joel
If you figure out who this is, (because I know you’re very intuitive) please only message me if you think you have to talk to anyone about it haha.
Thanks for listening to my dump lol!
I appreciate the cacophony...always good to know that other people deal with stuff too. ;)
DeleteAnd don't worry, I won't message you unless you want me to. :p